Embracing constructive criticism: a pathway to growth for future leaders

One of the main mistakes we all make in life is judging everything with a binary mindset – ie good or bad. This judgment is shaped by our experiences, teachings, culture and beliefs. Recognising that everyone’s judgment is subjective and influenced by their background is the first step before giving or receiving feedback. When we judge situations or people, we often compare them to our ideal version and from that perspective, we form our judgments.

Embracing different perspectives

If we look at judging in a business context, understanding that everyone has their unique way of seeing things can help you relax when receiving criticism or feedback. People view your actions and achievements through the lens of their experiences, ideals and objectives. Realising that it’s not personal, but rather a reflection of their perspective, can help you remain composed and open to the feedback. For instance, what one person views as a flaw, another might see as a strength. Someone can dislike how slow you are, while someone else can admire your calm. This awareness can help mitigate the emotional impact of criticism.

Self-judgment: the double-edged sword

We are often our own harshest critics, judging and labelling ourselves constantly against our ideals. When we receive criticism that aligns with our insecurities, it can hurt twice as much. This pain is amplified if we have a history of being judged harshly by significant figures in our lives, especially during our formative years. To overcome this, it’s essential to recognise this pattern and understand that feedback is an opportunity for growth; it’s someone else’s opinion or judgement, it’s not a confirmation of our fears or a death sentence in our work path.

Turning criticism into confidence

When criticism hurts it’s a signal to reflect on why it affects us deeply. Ask yourself: is it because others have seen a flaw you recognise in yourself and you were hoping no one else would see? Or because you sought validation and didn’t receive it? Either way, it’s an excellent opportunity to build confidence. Understanding the root of your reaction allows you to address your insecurities and start working on them. If the feedback doesn’t hurt but disappoints, it may indicate that your work wasn’t appreciated by a particular audience. Use this as motivation to improve if you really want them to appreciate your work, or maybe just seek appreciation elsewhere where your efforts might be better understood due to a better alignment in the roots.

Giving feedback: the objective approach

When providing criticism or feedback, strive to disconnect from your personality and view the situation objectively. Consider whether the subject at hand or their work serve the desired result – yes or no. It’s not about labelling something or someone as good or bad, but about assessing whether it meets the objectives. Communicate this clearly to ensure the recipient understands that it’s not a judgment of their worth as a human being, but a constructive assessment of how their actions or work align with your company’s goals. Be honest with yourself and with them, make sure they are not triggering any bad memory or past experiences, and focus on helping them grow from your wisdom, clarity and experience.

Recognising strengths and weaknesses

Our strengths and weaknesses stem from our born talents, our habits or from prior experiences. We all have unique capacities and potential. Recognise that strengths might be natural talents or skills learned from family and culture, while weaknesses could be areas we’ve never confronted or emotional limitations due to past experiences. By being aware of these aspects, we can work on modifying them through practice, learning and acceptance.

Practical tips for personal development

·      Self-awareness: Regularly reflect on your reactions to feedback. Understand your emotional triggers and work on them

·      Objective assessment: When receiving feedback, separate the content from the delivery. Focus on the actionable points, rather than the tone or phrasing

·      Goal setting: Use feedback to set realistic and achievable goals. Create a plan for personal and professional development

·      Open-mindedness: Embrace different perspectives and be open to diverse opinions. This can provide a more balanced view of your strengths and areas for improvement

·      Continuous improvement: Treat feedback as a continuous loop. Implement changes, seek further feedback and refine your approach

Mastering the art of giving and receiving feedback is a vital skill for future leaders. By understanding the subjective nature of judgment, embracing diverse perspectives and focusing on self-awareness, you can turn criticism into a powerful catalyst for growth. Remember: it’s not about being perfect, but about being open to continuous improvement and self-development.

·      Lorena Bernal is a certified life coach and founder of the events and coaching platform, Live Love Better